a sleepless night plagued by dreams (i mean that semi-conscious state you're in when you drift in and out of your dream. you're in your dream, but you're still aware of your surroundings. errm know what i mean?)
a shitty math paper which i didn't do enough to pass
and a restless nap
hasn't helped me feel any better.

am wondering, is there any difference between hypocrisy and facades?
facades seem so much milder, but in any case, we're still lying through our teeth to the people around us.
hypocrisy, facades - it's still a pretense isn't it?
hypocrisy can include meanness of spirit and inflicting harm on others; but when we put on a facade, pretending to agree when we don't agree, isn't it indirectly inflicting harm?
perhaps we're forced to slip on masks by circumstances and not intentions but it's still a false front anyhow.
pretending to be something you're not, not revealing the truth.
so there isn't much difference between both.
and i'm feeling very much like a hypocrite.

truth is so simple, but yet so hard to fathom and so incredibly powerful.
The truth can set you free - true in many ways, freeing you of bondage or guilt.
it's the immediate and future repercussions that we worry so much about.
we don't speak the truth because we fear we may be viewed under different light, we may hurt others and spoil relationships or simply to save ourselves a lot of trouble and at the same time creating a myriad of problems.

ok enough food for thought.
i am VERY hungry.
and i still need to study e1.
although i don't know what to study