you know when things become an i don't know?
it is when you know but you don't accept what you know, or when you absolutely do not know but you think you sort of know, that it becomes an i don't know.

so right now, i'm feeling like an i don't know.
and it is because i know but i don't accept what i know.

abit of a hate and love collide effect.
everything comes crashing in at once and crumbles into a huge mess of an i don't know.

i've been hearing alot about teamwork this whole year.
i've said alot about teamwork this whole year.
and teamwork has now melded into an i don't know.
i don't really know what it means to have teamwork any longer.

there's no 'I' in team.
but recently, everything and everyone has been taking the 'I' route.
words come easily, encouragements come easily, promises come easily, but then at the end of the day, it still boils down to an 'I'.
maybe even i am learning to adjust to the notion of an 'I' and steering towards this commonly walked path.

sports and relationships have a pretty similar creed, i realised.

Commitment, the decision we make, the path we choose to walk in and stick by.
during assembly that day, someone mentioned adversity brings out the true commitment in you.
since commitment is a choice we make out of free will, there's no backing out.
but then, it is through adversity that the true commitment level is revealed.
and it is also through adversity that commitment is strengthened.

Desire, if you don't want it, you won't work for it.
as simple as that.

Determination and Tenacity, the determination to carry it out, to stick it through, the tenacity to endure.

Teamwork, probably one of the most important.
Love, the driving force to hold the fort, to ignite determination, tenacity, commitment and desire.
you're only as strong as your weakest link.
if one doesn't hold up, the team won't hold up.

so today we lost.
we didn't hold the fort.
i feel blamed and i feel blameless.
i feel at fault, but yet i don't think i've made a mistake.

ohwell, but sports and relationships cannot be pressed into old mould.
sports is mind over matter.
the heart is MUCH trickier, i'd say.

and the boys won today.
they held the fort.
and i'm really proud of them :)

to the girls: we didn't play badly, but we didn't play well. and rj is a better team. we thank God for laying out the groundwork for us, but we also thank Him for showing us that we weren't strong enough. no more tears, because we know who deserves it more. and i'm really proud of the way you've all trained so hard these two weeks and gave rj such a hard fight today. "Instead of bronze i give you gold.." i think the true gold is learning that we had gaps within our team and how we can close it up and remain champs in our hearts :)