it's the last day of the year and i must say 2004 has been a very eventful year and it zipped by too quickly.

it's been a year full of change and new experiences but one thing i've never ever regretted was going to ACJC.
people say going to jc is foreign and strange and unreal because as you move on to a co-ed school (okay assuming you're from a single sex secondary school like i am) and a different education system altogether, people change and relationships get more superficial, but if there's only one thing i want to mention in my year of 2004, it has to be friendship.

friends come and go but the true ones have remained.
the bonds from secondary school have grown so much stronger now.
friends like michelle, fiona and becky who were my closest friends in secondary school are my closest friends still.
especially michelle because our friendship has seesawed quite abit since primary school, but having her in 2004 was truly a blessing.
and friends that i always know i can reach out to like cass, laura, shuling, slow, kren, cel, christine, joan, swong and lesley.
and of course the new friends like jame, rachyap, sue, tiff and rens who have been such an integral part of my jc life that i know in the future we'd probably still be friends.
and of course eric; our friendship has seen the most change this year and i'm grateful that we've come out of it stronger than ever.

and of course my family for which i am ever thankful for.
this year too has been a rocky relationship between my parents and i, where we're close but far.
another thing i learnt this year: learn to keep opinions to yourself.
although it seems false to keep what you feel hidden inside, but sometimes our thoughts erupt in a fit of pique, and if we actually let ourselves pause and think, they soon pass.
my dad always says one line, which although i admit, annoys me most of the time, i've learnt to come to appreciate
win the fight, lose the goodwill.

and last but not least, God and the small group.
He has blessed me greatly and loaded me with burdens but made me stronger.
and He has blessed me with a wonderful small group.
like i said before, rodney and yasmine have been great leaders and despite the small group not being my best friends, there's always this trust between us because we are part of the body of Christ.

this year has been one dedicated to relationships.
and that is exactly what our walk with God is all about: relationships.
relationship with God, relationships with family, relationships with friends, relationships with believers and non-believers.
and God has truly lifted up all my relationships.
with Him, with family and with friends.

weeeell, new year resolutions.
- to continue to walk in faith with God
- improve relations with family and friends
- STUDYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! very hard.
- train hard
- complain less and always be grateful

so it was a rather good birthday :)
even though i spent more than half of it in school at the second ogl camp assembling ENDLESS sheets of paper in our makeshift assembly line, dancing, marching, packing cds and pens and what have you.

and much thanks to michelle for the lovely cake and candle with no flame and matt's err.. prompting of the happy birthday song.
and to EVERYONE who wished me.
it really meant alot.
even people i'm not very close to wished me and it's a very VERY nice feeling knowing that they remembered.

for those i couldn't see today, tomorrow i will see them!
and too bad eric isn't around :(
and i will specifically thank TERENCE ONG for being the LAAAAST one to wish me.
good job rens :)
for a moment i really thought you'd forgotten.

so it was small group dinner after ogl camp at uncle rodney's house.
HE IS A BRILLIANT COOK.
although everything was incredibly cheesy and poor lactose-intolerant shuling was dismayed at the dairy-product filled food.
anyway, i didn't beat my record of three huge servings last year.
this year, i only hit two.
and cass, ever ready to chomp down on food.

and the game after was VERY strange.
i think it's funny if you're not participating.
but being the bewildered individual holding that card to your face while everyone is earnestly saying random and barely comprehensible things to you is very very confusing.
especially when you're half trying to figure out WHAT they're saying and the other half is frantically trying to think why are they saying it to you.
and the answer is just right in front of your face.
LITERALLY.

ohwell, we had a little talk after the dinner about what we wanted to share bout 2004.
and i'm really grateful for uncle rodney and yasmine.
rodney for being ever so knowledgeable and a very good counselor/friend-figure and yasmine for uniting the small group.
i'm really thankful that God has put them in my life and help me with my walk with God.
and i'm too very thankful that God has given me the courage to speak up more about Him and my faith and for answering my prayers.
i've been praying for the salvation of my friend and though he still doesn't believe, i have seen him change to be a better person in the course of our friendship.
a more mature, responsible and loving friend and well PRAISE GOD! :)

and something that cel said today.
love and friendship cannot co-exist at the same time.
it just struck a chord.
whether or not i agree, it's just food for thought.

being in weird confusing plights don't lend much comfort.
especially when the areas seem so grey and nothing can be done.
saying pushing it further is NOT the way is probably my way of saying i'm too chicken and backtracking is well.. N.A.
but then if there's anything i've learnt at all this year, it's faith and strength.

faith - "being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
Hebrews 11:1
faith in the Father who has taken me out of every sticky situation possible.
it's a little strange, but He hasn't taken me out of every sticky situation possible, but through faith, i know He will.
does that make sense?

"These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God has planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect."
Hebrews 11:39
Moses was a man for God, he obeyed, listened and took the Israelites out of Egypt. He challenged the pharoah, wandered through the desert for 40 years, was jeered at and given near-impossible tasks of controlling masses of people, which is evidently very VERY hard because no huge mass is like-minded at all.

so anyway, moses was promised the promise land that was to be given to the Israelites and he slogged for.. well he died when he was 120, so he must have slogged for a good 80-100 years!
and in the end?
HE ONLY GOT A GLIMPSE OF THE PROMISE LAND!
unfair isn't it?
slogging and suffering for 80-100 years of your life, waiting for the promise, but only given a glimpse of it.

so why then wasn't moses allowed to step onto the promise land?
for many reasons i'd presume.
1. because he disobeyed God
2. because he's old
okay let's concentrate on 2 first.
to enter the promise land, they had to fight kings, cross rivers and all these grisly things that require muscle.
and moses was a HUNDRED AND TWENTY years old.
realistically speaking, it is hard to be brimming with confidence when your leader is a hundred and twenty year-old man leading you to war.
and the israelites were prone to fear and often rebelled against God.
imagine if hundred and twenty year old moses told them, "PEOPLE, i will take you to fight this war and we will win."

so, following the death of Moses, Joshua was put in charge.
and through the death of Moses, the Israelites grieved and were obedient.
it was almost as though moses's death was a wakeup call for them.
so under God's mighty hand and Joshua's leadership, the Israelites finally resided in their promise land.

anyway what i'm trying to say is that sometimes things don't work out the way we want them to be.
we confuse what we want as what God should give us.
but then, through faith, we believe that God will answer our prayers and that He will be there.
does that mean immediately?
NOO, of course not.
moses was promised the promise land (actually it was abraham for his descendants and moses is a descendant), but he never got to step on it.
but because of what God had done through him, the Israelites made it to the promiseland.
THE PROMISE WAS FULFILLED!
and even though moses never got to step on the promise land and suffered, God was good to him.
He was a leader, he knew God "face to face" and "no prophet has risen in Israel like moses".
and when he died, "his eyes were not weak nor his strength gone".

so yeah, basically what im trying to say is that, confusion will pass.
sticky situations will dilute.
because God is there and He's perfect and we should always trust that what He does is right.

anyway, the past few days..


laura's christmas party :)
the food was awesome beyond awesome and the company fantastic.


kren's birthday


28th dec - OUR DAY WITH JAY!


our cooking


i love you michellee :)

so a very nice day it was today.
tuition (okay maybe not this), JAAAY, cooking and michelle :)
btw, new pics under christmas with family and christmas with friends

its been a really great christmas :)

spent christmas eve with the family complete with turkey, ham and the works.
although christmas never seems like such a big affair in the household, just spending time with the ones i love most in the world on such a special day makes christmas all the more special.
and i got a BIRTTTHDAY cake in advance from my aunt!!

christmas was spent with my favourite person and bestest friend in the whole wide world eric chang kuang fu.
even though we did absolutely nothing, like we always do, except walk sit and talk crap, it was nice spending my favourite holiday with my favourite person.

oh oh and this is quite completely off-tangent with the whole family and friends affair but i went to my dad's friend's house for a christmas gathering and the food was entirely prepared and cooked by this NINETEEN YEAR OLD BOY!
and his food is so professional and yummy, i honestly had no idea it was prepared by him!

okay so to top off a fantastic christmas, tomorrow i will spend boxing day with my girlfriends!
so happy i'll be seeing michelle!
she's been one of my longest friends, but this year our friendship has been going strong and what would i do without herrrrr!
but i miss fiona and becky and joaaan :(

i realised i am sinking into happy-christmas-i-love-everyone-the-world-is-lovely mushiness.
abit extreme for me, but since its christmas, i'll make some allowance :)

and MOST importantly, i want to remind myself and whoever reads this that without God's love, christmas wouldnt even exist.
lets spend this christmas remembering that it is JESUS CHRIST'S BIRTHDAY!

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."
John 3:16

over-used and cliched?
BUT IT IS TRUE!
sometimes i think we hear this verse so often that people think it's become a catch phrase for Christians to use to convert others.
sometimes i think i hear it so often, that i fail to stop and think about what this verse means and what God has done for us.

we've sinned and we ARE STILL SINNING.
big sins, small sins - we sin everyday.
like today, i didn't do my math but i told my dad i did.
i harboured jealousy in my heart.
i bitched.
and many other things that i probably think AREN'T sins.
but to save us, God sent his Son to die on the cross.
He sent his son to earth to save us, to teach us, to heal us, because he loves us so.
and he sent his son to die, because the wages of sin is death.

and now, because of His great love, we are saved!
think about it.
every christmas spent, isn't just about presents and family and food and friends.
we are free!
Christ was born and because He was born and died on the cross, we are saved!

so lets spend this christmas, not just enjoying the food and company.
lets spend this christmas with Jesus in our hearts.
let's remmeber his love and pass it on.
pass it on to those we love and do not love.
for the greatest christmas gift of all is You.

happy birthday to You
happy birthday to You
happy birthday dear Jesus
happy birthday to You!
:)

yesterday was a good day :)
had a friendly with sc in the morning followed by lunch with both grandmothers and my grandaunt and a very sleepy afternoon at my grandmother's house while all of them played mahjong for about five hours straight.

met up with eric gab adam and kren and shopped for groceries which i love to do very much.
then eric adam and i went on the funny ride outside wheelock which made my neck feel like it was going to snap right off my head and i couldn't walk straight after.
then off we went to gab's house to COOOOK!
eric and gab are really quite good cooks!
although gab put abit too much sauce for the beef so it was TOO salty and TOO hot.
but the pasta sauce eric and i did was QUIIIITE okay.
anyway the night progressed with sweets, chocolates and mahjong and it was a pretty fine night indeed :)
ohh and i got to see owen after so long!


eric and i with the christmas lights!


adam eric and gab with the groceries


COOOOOKING! dont be deceived by adam 'cooking'. he only chopped the sausages and did some tasting.


my favourite game :)

no photos of the food we cooked because it looked plain gross.
but it tasted ALOT better than it looked.

a day spent with family and friends is really my ideal day.
and i miss the AAgurls.
i haven't seen them, except for mich, jame, laura and dree and occasional waves to sue, in a really long time :(

christmas is coming and i love christmas.
there's something about christmas that makes me feel kinder and nicer because Christ was born and He was God's greatest love gift to us.
but it shouldn't just be a christmas occurance but an everyday habit so YES new year resolution: BE KINDER.
although i feel really guilty this year because i haven't gotten many people presents because i am SO SO broke :(
ohwell 2004 has really zipped by and i'm almost another year older.
growing old is so strange and bittersweet.

anyway two new albums are up!
click HERE! for ogl camp photos and
HERE! for days with friends :)

yesterday we headed down to sicc for an afternoon of squash, tennis and pingpong and it was rather good despite the sun beating down on us.
so doubles for squash was abit uneven in terms of skill but i let eric take most of the balls so i think it was quite okay.
and i learnt how to smash for pingpong :)
although i'd reckon i'll never get any good at it.
and as for tennis, IT WAS WAAAY TOO HOT for it to be enjoyed properly but i enjoyed myself nonetheless.

training yesterday morn was rather exhausting to say the least.
WE RAN!
the route that stella had led us before earlier in the year and only one word to sum up the run we had: unfit :(
courtwork wasn't much good either with mr koh making me run around in circles and i was simply too exhausted to run any faster or hit any harder.
and it felt lousy hearing him tell me i was too slow which is the truth :(
so i think i really have to get my act together and prepare for next year.

been thinking certain things for quite a while now and i thought i was able to shake it off but it seems to come whenever there's contact.
i hate feeling like i don't match up.
and i hate feeling as though i have to be somebody else but yet i know i never can be.
half of me wants to be but the other half doesn't.
does it make sense in a skewed kind of way?

i feel sick.
like literally.
must have been all the food i poured down my throat.
dinner at nydc with jame, gab, nigel and ryan and ryan paid for dinner which made me feel abit bad since i'd only just met him.

ktv was good but a little unfulfilling.
jaychou was top of the list and i managed to belt out shijiemori and heiseyoumo a sufficient number of times till everyone was sick of it.
and pity kbox doesnt have spice up your life and whatever else we sang the last time.

it's so hard to put thoughts into words.
or maybe we can, but sometimes we choose not to.
because an idea that is not in print is merely a fantasy.
and we're too scared sometimes to consolidate our thoughts and review them in print because we're scared of the truth.
ohwell, what's it that they say?
THE TRUTH HURTS.
much better to leave our thoughts elusive and fleeting.

lousy feelings have sprung up of late.
completely superfluous ones that should remain buried in their burial ground.
it's a strange feeling though, having everything sorted in your head but yet it goes round and round in circles.
it's like an organised confusion.
and i keep picturing various possible scenarios, which appear very real and practical in my dreams, but sheer folly in reality.

anyway my ego has taken abit of a bruising.
talking to my parents about it is therapeutic in a rather demoralising way.
self-realisation with honesty from those closest to you is bittersweet.
knowing that they'd never lie to you is good and bad.
good because who likes to be lied to.
and bad because you know no matter how much you'd like to shun from the truth, IT IS THERE.

and it's always nice to know someone out there empathises with you.
that's what girlfriends and heart-to-hearts are for :)

I CAN HARDLY WAIT FOR ORIENTATION 2005 BECAUSE IT IS GOING TO BE SO SO SO GOOOOOOOD!
ogl camp was really one of the highlights of my holidays and much thanks to GRENDALIS for that :)
like mich said, ogl camp and orientation 2005 really wouldn't be the same if we weren't in Grendalis and if we didn't have each other.

so it was a really fun-filled four days with games, dancing (i still can't remember the second dance properly!!! IT IS TOOOOOO FAST), painting (our banner looks very nice and hunky) and cheering/singing.
and i've to go back for the second ogl camp to re-learn the dance and it's on my birthday :(

ohwell been having strong yami yoghurt cravings.
before church camp, i started having them.
then after church camp, i've had it everyday since.
and i STIILLLL WANT MORRRREEE..

ktv sessions haven't been materialising.
BUT BUT.. hopefully the one we planned on sunday materialises because my throat is aching to sing.

this year has zipped by way too quickly.
before i even settled comfortably into the holidays, december came.
and soon, christmas is coming.
christmas always marks the approaching new year which immediately translates into school.
and in this case, the new j2 year.
i don't know what to think :

ho ho ho GRENDALIS!
that's my clan and matt's the clan leader.
matt is seriously a SUPER SUPERRRR good clan leader.
i'm so glad he's my clan leader and mich is my ogl partner :)
and my dance partner is the DANCE PRESIDENT ohhhhmygoodness.. and to think before the ogl pairings i was commenting about how i didn't want the dance president to be my partner because that's just too humiliating but ohwell :|

okay anyway i shall refrain from adding too many details lest some soon-to-be acjc students read this.
anyway the dance is veryyyy hard :(

okay this is a supremely crappy entry
and YAAAAAAAAAAAAY ktv tmr.

church camp was good in a really special way.
a way i never expected but i certainly learnt alot of things along the way.

like karen said, we're all so self-centred.
it's always about ME, US, how WE feel, how God makes US feel; that perhaps we forget the reason why God created us: to glorify Him and spread His word.

we're put on this earth for a reason, a purpose.
and we're forever waiting.
we're always waiting for something.
in primary school, we wait for secondary school.
in secondary school, we wait for jc.
in jc, we wait for university.
and we're always looking ahead at these prominent markers in our lives which supposedly craft our future, that we forget about the present.
God put us in a particular family, school and situation for a reason.
but most of the time, we're always looking ahead that we simply forget the people around us and what we're capable of doing through Him.

it struck me that perhaps now i'm in the necessary place.
and i haven't been taking the necessary steps for doing what i'm called to do.
to let go of my ashes and listen and do what He wants me to do.

but of course it's not easy.
we're always fearful.
i'm always fearful.
i fear that people will look at me funny.
i fear rejection.
i fear MYSELF - that i lack the faith and courage to commit.
but with God, whom shall i fear?

and last of all, i really thank God for my small group, especially yasmine.
she's done so much for us, prayed for us and seen us grow as Christians for over a year now.
and through this camp, i'm really thankful too for friends like lesley shuling cass and kren.
MAY WE ALWAYS BE ON FIRE FOR THE LORD AND NEVER BURN OUT BECAUSE HE IS OUR EVERLASTING GOD WHOM WE LOVE :)

ohwell ogl camp tomorrow.
I GET TO SEE MICHELLEEE!
and we're in matt's clan so should be preeeeetty good.

first things first..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY FIONA LIAW KEQIAN :)


here's to our four years of friendship AND MANY MORE TO COME!
happy 17th my dear :)
you've really been a great friend all these years. my ever present cold comfort in times of need, my FAVOURITE shopping and lunch buddy and perhaps the only person i feel entirely comfortable with in silence.
love youuuu my grummmpy fiona :)

was having freak sickness yesterday.
i say freak because i was feeling feverish all day and i ran a fever at night and this morning.
but then when the fever was gone, i felt absolutely fine!
no sore scratchy throat, no snuffly nose, no whatever.
just a slight ache in my bones and the slightly light-headed sensation everyone gets after a fever.
probably the weather i'd reckon.

was rather nice catching up with fiona yesterday after having not seen her in three weeks.
sitting at nydc and travelling from town to bugis to suntec (my POOOOR ACHING LEGS) and finally sitting down in one corner at suntec eating yami yoghurt just.. talking.
it was good :)
i haven't sat down and had a proper heart to heart in sometime.
so after that we trooped down to Ritz Carlton to see the seniors at their prom and OH. MY. GOODNESS. THEY WERE ALL LOOKING SO DARRRRRN GORGEOUS AND DRESSED UP i swear i couldn't recognise some of them.
abit of a spoiler but my cam ran out of batt halfway :|
so i managed to take a picture with liz and one with cheryl using michloh's cam and i waited and WAITED for stella who didn't appear so i decided to leave.
and thats when she came hurhur.

skipped training today because of the fever this morn.
spent the morning feeling sick and banging on the piano.
i'd bet my neighbours think i'm SUPREMELY annoying and lousy because EVERY SINGLE DAY my neighbour's sons play the piano. and beautifully at that.
initially when i realised they were decently good pianists i refrained from playing but after a while i simply couldn't care less.
so i've been churning out rough-edged sounding-but-not-really-sounding-like jaychou songs on the piano everyday.
and no wonder they say practise makes perfect.
because I HAVE GOTTEN BETTER :)
in my opinion at least.

eric popped by to say hello so that was quite a pleasant surprise.
had a pretty decent chat.
nothing substantial really but it was nice seeing eric after.. SEVEN WEEKS :)

spent the entire afternoon lolling about the house and everything else is completely un-blogworthy.

SO.. off i go tomorrow for church camp.
i'm rather looking forward to it.
nothing beats a spiritual rejuvenation and it's probably something i need right now in my life.
ogl camp straight after church camp.
i must say..
WHERE DID THE HOLIDAYS FLY TO?!
time simply passes TOO quickly
>:O

mich: yehhyeh its okay la dont need to feel bad i wanna hear all about the concert because i decided i am emotionally stable to hear about it now :) HURHUR. oh.. hmm we ought to have tuition soon right? how bout after ogl camp? the week after? although that simply seems too.. soon :(

stella: SORRRRRRRRY! and oooohweee seriously worked backstage?! whoa no wonder fiona was telling me her friend got to meet jaychou and take a picture with him! its the same person i'd reckon?

j: HULLLLLLO :) we must meet soon okay?

anw just a couple of pics i'm posting up.
click HERE!

i am stuck alone in singapore without my friends.
or at least without majority of my friends.
thank goodness for some of them, but they're all irreplaceable.

it is really very annoying to have a million things running through your head that is dying to come out but when you're actually seated down, keyboard under fingertips, the thoughts seem to have rolled into an incomprehensible bundle.
it makes me feel vaguely inadequate, like i can't even express myself properly.

so anyway, after a really lousy training session, i went home and cooked myself instant noodles and watched my new vcd.
not drama serial, but movie.
as much as i love and breathe tv, i think it's extremely unhealthy.
it breeds unrealistic notions.
but it was a good show :)

and somehow this whole topic of tv reminded me about a little argument/discussion i had a while back with my mother about my genius RI gepper cousin who DOESN'T WATCH TV AT ALL.
and i kept insisting that he may be super clever but there's no way he'd be able to survive next time without watching TV!
and my mother tried fishing out other alternatives like.. but he reads the newspaper.. he reads encyclopedias.. he always researches.. like OKAY.
i'm abit too tired to go into my reasons as to why TV (and i don't mean just documentaries and CNN) is an invaluable source of information and medium of education, partly because i fear they may sound too err.. well you know.
but okay, this is very out of point.

i am feeling hungry.
for once, my house has nothing to eat.

been indulging in local fare alot lately.
so this afternoon after church, cause of a flat tyre, we found ourselves at tiong bahru to fix it after driving about fruitlessly.
so tiong bahru food it was :)

we couldn't find our favourite pork organs porridge so we settled for prawn noodles.
but later we found the porridge at the other side and my parents and i simply couldnt resist so we each had a bowl.
I WAS SO FULL.

anyway it's been a lazy day.
i spent the whole of yesterday uploading the photos and today captioning them.
so have fun!
click HERE! for photos.

there's probably this unspoken rule that blogging in the morning is just wrong for the obvious reasons that the day has barely started so WHAT IS THERE TO BLOG ABOUT?

but nevermind, 9.38 am and i've been up for ONE and OVER A HALF hours packing my desk and drawers.
probably suffering from non-serious jetlag where my body refuses to let me sleep later than 8 and i'm already conscious by 7.
which is cruel, really, because before my holiday i couldn't roll my lazy butt off my bed before noon.
so yes, i woke up at 7, attempted to fall back asleep, did fall drowsily back into slumber for about half an hour before playing snake2 on my phone and getting out of bed at 8.

then i looked at my room and my TINY room is bursting with things.
you know how the room is so cluttered you can't walk about without tripping over something or having to shove something elsewhere?
and your desk is so messy and full you can't see what colour it originally was and the things just literally pile up?
well, YES, MY ROOM WAS EXACTLY LIKE THAT!
for the people who have seen exactly how awful my room is, you know what it's like, except its about ten times worse this time.

so i discovered a FEEWWW things.
some that made me smile, some that made me cringe and some that i simply err.. threw away.
okay this is damn rambly.

so for the sake of not blogging later at night since i'd already blogged before my day even commenced, i shall predict exactly what i'm doing for the day.
which is probably accurate.
1. WATCH TV!!!
2. chicken rice for lunch with LIVERRRR yum. i know this because i told my mom to buy it.
3. watch MORE tv.
4. decide what should be the next thing to clear in my room, wardrobe perhaps. but i'll do that another day.
5. nap/tv/go online/read.
6. have dinner somewhere. i'd reckon chinese food because I MISSSSS IT.

okay.
i think ever since i came back, i've been a bit off my rocker.
a little high strung, prone to useless tears (DONT ASK WHY), frustrated (i keep thinking about next year and all the homework i havent done which i dont want to do but i'll probably do sometime), and disoriented.
i dislike the way the next two weeks for me would be cramped with camps when i very much need relaxation and the joyful comforts of home.

okay and just for your information.
i actually blogged this morning for the sole reason of showing you this!

Your Boobies' Names Are: Abercrombie & Fitch

Get your own Boobie Names

HOW COOL IS THAT! esp since i've just come back from the us.
HURHUR.

okay the sole reason of posting that up, and it's multiplied into 6 paragraphs worth of ramblings stretched and extended from one and a half hours.

i think i'm going mad.

i am back home i am SO happy.
although it's a rather delayed announcement because i was back on wednesday but due to technical problems (my modem spouted smoke) i couldn't get online.
and it's very strange indeed, having not blogged in two weeks and start blogging again.
it's like meeting a friend you missed very much, but when you finally meet him/her again, you're at a loss for words.

so..
I HEARD THE JAYCHOU CONCERT WAS LIKE SO FANTASTIC AND OMGGGGG I WISH I COULD GO!!!
:( :( :( :(
when mich was telling me about it i felt elated but yet so terribly unhappy at the same time like i didnt know whether to laugh or cry so in the end i cried because i think i was more unhappy than happy about it.
ohwelllll.
as terribly dumb as this sounds..
i think i feel as lousy as when i broke up.
MYYYY HEART ACHES FOR JAYCHOU TO COME BACKKKK SO I CAN GO FOR HIS CONCERT.

okay so back to reality, the holiday was pretty okay.
since 9 days is simply too much to pack into a single post, i think there are only a couple of things i can remember offhand.
like
1. how it was FREEZING and i've never seen so many strollers and kids and people in sneakers and hoodies in my life.
2. i am terribly sick of burgers and fries.
3. MY HOTEL WAS IN THE OC!!
4. we were so sick of disneyland we took a bus to southcoastplaza without the slightest clue about how to get there. and thats the mall marissa took ryan for christmas shopping. anyway its HUGE.
5. the day we were supposed to go to this really good factory outlet.. IT WAS THANKSGIVING. so.. it was closed. grr.
6. universal studios was fantassssstic. too bad i didnt get to take photos with the characters cause we were running short of time.
7. i am terribly sick of sausages and scrambled eggs and pancakes.
8. i think shamu the killerwhale and dunsten/dolly or whatever his/her name is the dolphin is SO SO SO cute. that was at san diego seaworld. nice :)
9. i sneaked into a vegas show cos it was 18 and above. quite nice.
10. I LOVE TOON TOWN! mickey's house is grrrrreat.
11. we spent err an hour at mexico. it was QUITE a sight.

ok i'm sure there's more but for the timebeing that is all i can remember.
the pics are pretty shitty because i couldn't figure out the right stuff to use on the new camera for some of the funny night modes and stuff so yeah lots of blurry lights.
and i couldn't take shamu flipping in the air because of my terribly slow fingers.
and i got abit lazy to take photos at universal studios.
so i've got HEAPS of lousy ones of the hoover dam (which is very boring. i was expecting gushing water at the floodgates or smth but no.. i can't even see any water) and grand canyon which was BEEAUUTIFUL.
it made me wish i took geography.
ha ha.

anyyyyway..
THANKS MICH for taking pics and recording anjing for meeee! shiiizz you were one of the few people i missed SO much on the trip man :(
and laura, i didn't get to see your msg! so i didnt get you your hat!
and JOANNNNNNNNN OMG YOU ARE SO KIDDING ME.
seriously?
ohhhhh.
myyyyy.
goshhh.
that is so.. i have no words.
i'll mail you ASAP!

okay this post sounds incredibly gushhyyyy but yes that is exactly how i feel.
i feel like CRYYYYING AND YELLING AND TYPING IN CAPS BECAUSE IT HELPS ME DESTRESSSSS.
sob.
jay chou, please come back next year.